Adoption- Conquering Taboos

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Kush Pandya
2 years ago

Adoption is always thought of as a last resort. Most parents seek other methods to bear children, and only when all options are exhausted do they hesitantly seek adoption.

Why does adoption have such shameful and negative connotations associated with it in our society?

There isn't anything wrong, immoral or vile about this process. It is as pure and natural as biological birth. At the end of both, you go home with a beautiful stranger whom you make your own.

Through the medium of adoption, a caring and lovely home can be provided to the many vagabond children, who are roaming street from the street in search of basic sustenance and continued survival. This approach can help our nation with so many of its development goals such as increased literacy rate; lower infant mortality; and proper nourishment and education to the needy. Those who are trying to expand their family can use this approach to change the life of a child for the better.

This isn't merely charity either. Adopting a child has the same weight and responsibility as taking care of a child with whom you're biologically related.

Often, parents who are looking to adopt consider the process to be similar to buying a pet for the house. They express whims and demands in the child they choose. They look for their desired caste, complexion, physical dexterity, sex in the child. These whims would not be possible if the child were a product of natural birth. There is no returning a child of your body, due to some defect which you might find unflattering. Then why have such a fussy attitude when adopting. Adoption is meant to be a child-centric process, not parent-centric.

Adoptive parents are often apprehensive about the questions society will ask when they go for adoption. These questions may be voiced or just an inner dialogue amongst oneself. They fret about people calling into question their manhood, virility or them being barren and impotent. The parents feel that society will see them in lower light. This orthodox and retrograde mindset shouldn't come in the way of the parents and their future child's happiness.

Instead of fostering such taboos that have plagued adoption for so long, let's divulge into an honest conversation on the subject and bring all our views and feelings into the open.

Having reservations about adoption is natural. Many fear if they'll be able to relate to an adopted child, the way they would to a biological one. Or the other way round, if the child would have a proper familial connection with them. There's always a dilemma about telling the kid if they are adopted or not. Or how to break this news to them in the best possible way and how they would react when told the news. Will this break down their confidence and self-esteem? Will it create a rift in the family as they might start questioning everything? Would they continue to love you the same?

Nurturing a child is never easy, and adoption can add extra burden to this already challenging task. But it stands to reason, isn't it a fair bargain to undergo all these hardships in return for emotional succor who will shower you with unrequited love and adoration for the rest of your life.

One shouldn't fear adoption, because they're worried that they won't be able to relate to other parents who have biological children, or vice-versa. Living in a conservative bubble, won't help you and your family reach their goals of contentment; only conquering these taboos will.

Stay Tuned, Stay Relevant!

This article has been reviewed by our panel. The points, views and suggestions put forth in this article have been expressed keeping the best interests of fellow parents in mind. We hope you found the article beneficial.
• kids
• parents
• taboos
• adoption
• stigma