Source: The Independant
Learn the difference between protest and disrespect. Complaint is a communication of feeling about a certain request, practice or event. Disrespect is when those feelings result in making it personal.
Prioritize relationships over consequences. Irrespective of how children come into your life, at what age or for how long, all correction techniques will fail without a sturdy loving relationship. From the moment you meet a child your importance should be to learn about them, their thoughts, moods, comforts, etc., and in turn they will learn about you.
• Initial response should be empathy. “I am sorry that didn’t work out how you thought it would.” “It must be difficult when you feel targeted by others.”
• Engage in conversation about the issue in a non-judgmental way. Be a good asker of questions to spur the conversation –do not forget to listen to their response.
• Naturally, a learning opportunity presents itself in the conversation, if not ask the child how are they going to “make it right”? Always allow natural moments to do the work for you if possible.
• Praise them for their cooperation, remind them how special they are to you, regularize making mistakes and highlight learning.
Don’t ever give up! Giving up can look many ways. It can be having a child unconcerned from your care, cutting ties with a child after a breakup or simply “checking out” when you’re feeling overwhelmed. Every child needs to know, without hesitation, that if they are willing to trust you with their heart you will be there for as long as they need you.